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5.23.13_Pt. 2

May 23, 2013

One of the things I read a lot are people’s revelations. They’ve just realized something and have created a well articulated post or article about it. I find that most of these things they’re learning are common sense.

From the time we are babies, most of what we learn is from observation. Babies and toddlers especially copy the actions, sounds and words of their parents and those around them. These days that means playing at talking on the phone and pretending to type on the computer. But the point is, we learn by example. Along the way we use our own judgement on how best to get things done, and throughout the years merge all we’ve learned and discovered to become who we are.
People do this all the time, throughout their whole lives I believe. Even if they’re stubborn and determined to do things their own way, sometimes you subconsciously mirror others. My best friend in college and I used to do this. We’d go out shopping separately and come back with the same things. We had similar hair styles for a while. A mutual friend shopped with us and noted that, while browsing separately we touched and were interested in the same items. This is of course also an example of being drawn to like-minded people, but…
If people do this, and even recognize it, why then do they not learn from these experiences? Is it simply human nature to repeat the past? Do we secretly or subconsciously enjoy dealing with the same conflicts and thoughts over and over? Personally, I hate it. And I know many would say the same when asked. Why then do we not learn from our mistakes, and the mistakes of others?
On Thought Catalog, Donna Peterson wrote an article entitled It’s Okay To Be Not-Okay. She talks about her new found decision to be okay, with things not being okay. Why do we strive for perfection, knowing it will never happen? She states:
“Most of the pain and unhappiness in my own life – and I would go so far as to say most of the pain and unhappiness in other people’s lives as well – is directly attributable to a pathological inability to tolerate the Not-Okay.”
How true is that? If I could teach anyone, anything – ever – it would be to learn from your mistakes. When things seem awful and unfair, or don’t turn out how you’d like, accept that and move on. Strive to be okay with the outcome. Peterson continues on to say:
“We fail to recognize this simple truth: that implicit in the act of living is the possibility of f-cking it up. We sell out on the deepest convictions of our hearts to placate other people; we avoid suffering at all costs, choosing instead to submerge our pain in sex or alcohol or food or video games or socializing or stamp-collecting; we quietly bury our chancier dreams to make room for a life of comfort and ease and predictability; we make decisions we wouldn’t otherwise have made in the name of keeping the peace; we fear failure and so refuse to hazard anything at all.”
And while this is true, I would also stress to learn from this. The biggest problem I see when talking things out with people is that this isn’t the first time they’re having to talk this out. Especially when you seek the advice of others, don’t just hear what they say but listen. You’ll never learn from someone else if you don’t listen to what they’re saying. And going back to the beginning, when learning from doing this is as simple as copying what they do. It’s personally my favorite way to learn. I need to not only be told or read the how, but see it. That way, at least in the beginning, I can know that if I copy what you’re doing my end result should be the same.
So it’s alright to read and watch and hear all the amazingly worded revelations of others, but if you actually want to believe it, and you want things to change and be better, you have to listen and remember their words in your next time of need. As an artist, this equates to a typographical poster of some sort. But still, it’s no good making and displaying the poster if you’re just going to keep doing the same ‘ol, same ‘ol. 
One Comment leave one →
  1. May 23, 2013 7:46 pm

    Nice review and well said at that. Glad you found the article link insightful.

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